暖が言った寝る前の言葉
「ママ笑って」
子供は母親の顔色が気になるのです。
母親の機嫌が良ければそれだけでハッピーなのです。
母親が怒らなければそれだけで、子供の精神状態は安定します。
怒らないこと
そう、それは大切なことです。
でも、我慢だけでは、我慢していると感じていると余計に我慢が辛く、我慢から、爆発。なんてことも。
だから、イライラすることがあったら、
「ママ今は機嫌悪いからね。」
「しばらく、近づかないでね」
と言った予防線を張って不満やイライラを解消してから子供との時間を共有すると言った工夫が必要ですね。
何でもかんでも我慢なんて人間だものできるわけありません。
そう、イライラしても怒っても良いんです。
それが子供に向かわなければね。
そして、子供は常に母親の顔色と伺っているんだと胸に刻んでください。
あなたが、不安な顔や疲れた顔をしているだけで子供は不安なんです。
それを誤魔化すようにはしゃいでいます。
それは、埋めたい心の傷を自分で癒しているんです。
昨夜寝る前の一言
「寝るよ」
「はい」
「ママ笑って」
それまで、ジジに一生懸命説明をしていたのにその一言で
下を向いて
「はい」
と言い、下を向き
その後ママの顔を見上げ
「ママ笑って」
これには胸を締め付けられました。
そう、ジジは遊び相手にはなるかもしれませんが
子供が本当に望んでいるのは
母親の楽しそうな笑顔なんだなあ
と改めて思いました。
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